It thoroughly debunks the hypothesis that Global Warming is human-caused.

I challenge you to watch it, then tell me you still worship Al Gore.

Sometimes we can be in such a hurry to respond in debate that we trip over ourselves in doing so.

Our third winner today is talk show host Don Imus.

Soooooooo, what do you use the Internet for?

…

CLASSIC VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he’s
a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the
ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he
dies out in the cold.

Moral: Be responsible for yourself!

MODERN VERSION

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he’s
a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the
shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why
the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold
and starving.

CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
table filled with food. “America” is stunned by the sharp contrast. How
can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is
allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody
cries, then they sing “It’s Not Easy Being Green.” Bill and Hillary
Clinton make a special guest appearance on the CBS Evening News to tell
a concerned Dan Rather that they will do everything they can for the
grasshopper who has been denied the prosperity he deserves by those who
benefited unfairly during the Reagan summers, or as Bill refers to it as
“Temperatures of the 80’s.”

Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton stage a demonstration in front of the
ant’s house where the news stations film the group singing “We shall
overcome”. Jesse then has the group kneel down to pray to God for the
grasshopper’s sake.

Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has
gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate
tax hike on the ant to make him pay his “fair share”. Finally, the EEOC
drafts the “Economic Equity and Anti-Ant Act”, retroactive to the
beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire a
proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his
retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
federal judges that Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare
recipients who can only hear cases on Thursday’s between 1:30 and 3:00
PM when there are no talk shows scheduled. The ant loses the case. The
story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the
ant’s food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be
the ant’s old house, crumbles around him since he doesn’t maintain it.

The ant has disappeared in the snow. And on the TV, which the
grasshopper bought by selling most of the ant’s food, they are showing
Bill Clinton standing before a wildly applauding group of Democrats
announcing that a new era of “fairness” has dawned in America.

The grasshopper is found dead in a drug related incident and the house,
now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once
peaceful neighborhood.

Moral: Be careful how you vote.

STATEMENT
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

“We at CNN and Court TV would like to issue a complete and sincere apology to all the Duke Lacrosse players and their families for the prejudiced and untrue accusations and inferences reported last year by our ne…